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Mommy wants vodka – but settled for candy



Mommy Needs Wants Vodka Eating My Kids Candy
www.mommyneedsvodka.com

Oh me, oh my. I’ve done it now! See, my kids get candy all the time. There’s the summer parade in town, where their cherub-like faces look hopefully at each float as they hold out their recycled ice cream buckets. They even got their picture in the paper this past summer at a local parade. So actually they get at least 2 parades in the summer!
Then there is Halloween of course. I still have a boxful of that stuff on my fridge. Lollipops are the last to go. Not to mention Christmas, right?! They get tons of stuff and sneak like mice into my cupboards every other time of the year.
Am I rationalizing? Damnstraight. But it is the truth, they get more than they can eat. It is a mathematical certainty. What am I supposed to do, toss it out? Bring it to work and set it in the commons area? Problem is, now they “get it.” They know what candy they have, how much, who gave it to them and when. This wasn’t the case even 6 months ago. And obviously when they were a year old or so, there was no guilt since they couldn’t eat any of it, obviously.
But NERDS, man. I have reached a new low, I believe. It’s one thing to sneak a Tootsie Roll, Lifesavers, or even a Kit Kat, but I stole his Nerds.

Should I fess up or wait to see if he notices? I think we all know the answer to that one. Were the roles reversed (what am I saying—99.9% of the time the roles ARE reversed), he would just wait for me to notice before he trounces off to Time Out. The tree does not grow far from the apple, my friends.