Friendships in life, like all relationships, are supposed to be a two-way street. While that’s the ideal situation, not all friends and partners hold up their end of the bargain. When we’re taken advantage of in life, the only solution is to distance ourselves from the toxic problems that bring us down—even if that means saying goodbye to people we truly care about.
I’ve had a few friends in my life who, for one reason or another, are no longer in my life. Whether it be because they were holding me back, they were toxic to my mental health, or they were straight up liars—I said goodbye to people who were once my best friends. But, I’m not alone. Plenty of people have stopped talking to their best friend altogether—and, they’re sharing online exactly why.
She was never there for me, yet she expected me to be her 24/7 therapist.
She was the best friend I ever had, we were constantly talking about how much of a soulmate I were to her, how close we were, how identical we were. We were in different classes so we got to see each other rather seldom, but we chatted everyday till late night.
Then at once she stopped talking to me and shortly after blocked me on all social media. Nothing had happened. Now she can’t even look me in the eyes. I am unable to answer why.
We went to different colleges and neither of us are super good at remembering to use social media/messaging to keep up with people.
We still like each others’ rare facebook posts and instagram posts, but since neither of us is much for initiating conversation, I feel this is how our friendship will be until either facebook or one of us dies.
Didn’t invite me to his wedding on his now wife’s behest. Was his first ever, longest and most trusted friend to that point.
Because I realized she walked all over me ALOT and when I started standing up for myself she didn’t like it.
He got married and I was single. His wife didn’t want him hanging around a guy who was dating girls and not married. I’d visit him and it got to the point where we’d just stand outside the whole time. Took me a while to realize he wasn’t inviting me in to sit down because his wife didn’t want me there.
I did what I still think was the right thing and faded into the background and silently wished him and his wife the best.
Because we didn’t give our friendship the respect it deserved, even if you move separate ways in life I believe that keeping in touch, making an effort, and giving up “convenience “ so you can spend time together are things a lot of people let ruin their friendships because they can be things we forgive ourselves, and each other for ignoring.
We parted ways a while ago because of her behavior. It took me a long time to realize a narcissist. She’s been trying recently to reestablish the friendship, but I keep my distance since it’s obvious she does not care about me at all.
For example, she texted me two weeks ago because she absolutely wanted to set a time to talk on the phone so that she could hear about how my brother’s wedding (they used to be friends and a lot of mutual friends attended, she wasn’t invited though). So I called her at the agreed upon time and she tells me she’s so excited to hear about the wedding, talks about herself for two hours and then says she has to go and hangs up. She never once asked about the wedding during the conversation and she never realized that we didn’t talk about the wedding.
I’m working on cutting all contact again.
She seduced my husband. They’re married now & taught my young kid to call her mom & me by my name. I never retaliated, but she hates me & finds little passive aggressive ways to use my son to hurt me (as above) on a regular basis. So forgiving her just isn’t something I can ever make progress on with the constant antagonism.
We were friends from the very beginning of primary school, but drifted apart in our last year if high school. She started hanging out with older friends, drinking and taking drugs. I was focused on doing well in my final exams, whilst she didn’t even show up for some of them. Shortly after we finished high school she got pregnant and I never really saw her again after that, as her boyfriend didn’t really want her hanging out with any of her old friends, me included apparently. She has two kids now, and last I heard she was planning on going to university. I wish her well, but our lives just went down very different paths in the end.