Whoever said women aren’t funny should bite their damn tongue.
i hate when my friend starts dating an idiot and i have to be like how could you bring this man into our lives
— dirt prince ⚫️ (@pants_leg) August 4, 2018
If a woman has sex with a lot of men she's a slut, but if a man does it then he's a homosexual. when will the double standards end.
— Renea (@Letsboldlygo) November 23, 2018
so no one told you life was gonna be this way pic.twitter.com/V6FnrtENtE
— dream ghoul (@TheDreamGhoul) June 25, 2018
This girl I used to go out with is still using my Netflix and that's cool. She's watching Scandal and is currently on S7E12. Series finale is S7E18. Guess who's changing her password as soon as she gets to episode 17? Yep, it's Petty Labelle.
— 🏳️🌈Quee(r)n Regina (@heyqueenregina) November 26, 2018
*stares in Muslim* pic.twitter.com/5Qbne8p52J
— Samira Ahmed (@sam_aye_ahm) October 26, 2018
WHY DOES EVERY ONLINE RECIPE BEGIN WITH A 40 PAGE ESSAY ABOUT SOMEONES HUSBAND DOG AND KIDS AND A BRISK WALK THEY TOOK IN THE FALL AND HOW THEY LOVE THE CHANGING OF THE LEAVES AND THEIR DOGS FAVORITE TREAT. GIMME THE RECIPE HON MY SCROLL FINGER HURTS
— Chelsea Peretti (@chelseaperetti) November 22, 2018
my ex told me one time that i only have guy friends bc they want to fuck me and i honestly think about it all the time when i’m fucking my guy friends
— alexa (@playnikes) October 14, 2018
I went through the chick fil a drive through bawling and the girl asked me if I wanted a chocolate or vanilla milkshake. And I was like no I ordered a sweet tea and she goes “no honey you need a milkshake”
— Mi (@remigiomia) October 23, 2018
see when boys say gals being too drunk is a turn off am like ???? mate am no drinking to make me more attractive, am drinking to make YOU more attractive
— olivia (@_oliviabeth) July 2, 2018
Women’s magazines really convinced me that “going from day to night” was going to be a big part of my adult life, but so far it has not come up.
— Margaret Lyons (@margeincharge) May 17, 2018