Some of our teenagers think they are slick. They hide things in their sock drawers, they think we don’t hear them up late on the phone, and they truly believe we were all born yesterday. Contrary to their belief, many of us parents were once kids, too. We, too, snuck around and hid things from our parents. So, we know what they are trying to do when they are attempting to “pull a fast one on us.”
Recently, mothers on Reddit began sharing the “hidden secrets” their children think they are hiding but, in reality, they already know point blank. Some of them have to do with pornography, others some sneaking out—but, the moral of the story is that mothers know everything.
Those tissues… You ain’t got no cold, son.
My teenage daughter doesn’t know that I know she Snapchats with the boy she says she can’t stand and saves everything he sends her.
My 16yr old son watches cam-porn. If you are sitting in bed, laptop on your lap, think about how the screen might reflect off the picture behind you! Geez… At least close the tab when i come in the room…
I know my 13 year old daughter takes an Uber to school when it’s raining or when she is running late. She doesn’t realise her Uber account is connected to my credit card and she must think the Uber fairy pays for it.
I set alarms for the morning on the amazon echo. When I leave the room my daughter cancels them and I hear her snicker “no school tomorrow haha”. What she doesn’t realize is I also have an alarm clock and my phone. She’s five.
My son’s a bit older now, but when he was 11 I found out he was watching breast feeding videos and vaginal shaving videos on YouTube. Apparently these videos are “science” so the nudity is allowed. Slick lil dude found a loophole. Didn’t confront him about it, but it did make me have “the talk” with him. Had me crackin up, but the wife wasn’t as tickled as I was, lol.
My wife was the one to make the discovery but she doesn’t use reddit much so I’ll share on her behalf. When she revealed to our 7 year-old son that we can see everything he’s searched on any device, he got terrified and embarrassed. The worst thing we found was YouTube searches for stuff like “people showing their butts” or “smooching”
My 19 year old son thinks I don’t know he smokes pot.
Child please, you cannot fool the Master.
My teenage daughter has an electric toothbrush in her underwear drawer I’m pretty sure she masturbates with.
Christ. We have one of those fridge cameras. I was at the grocery store and I checked the cam as I often do. There was my son closing his ding dong in the fridge repeatedly. I must have been pretty horrified as I couldn’t help but watch him just to try and figure out what he was doing. Is this some new age masturbation technique?
My daughter is 8. I know immediately when someone is bullying her, because she comes home angry and sad. It’s always directed at me.
I let her teacher know, just to keep an eye on it, and I hug my little one tight and wait for her to tell me about it.
That my teenage son has an empty box of condoms under his bed…yes, we’ve had the talk but…EMPTY??!!
My daughter used to ‘eat a cookie’ and ask for another. But I’d find hundreds of cookies squirreled around various drawers, inside toys, and under her bed. She must have died during the Great Depression in a past-life of something.
That my 13 yo daughter writes shitty manga type sex stories. I don’t even really care about the sex stuff, I know kids explore or whatever, but the writing itself is SO bad. Like the grammar, sentence structure, spelling… It’s a hot mess. Also, sometime later I brought up talking about how sex/foreplay/relationships and all that bc once again, the ‘stories’ are just terrible.
My daughter (adult now) still doesn’t realize I know she is bi. My now adult son doesn’t realize I know he is an ass man and was sending dick pics and watching porn at 14. (I just made several conversations about how I can’t believe how many people under 18 are doing this and it’s considered child porn…if parents found it could press charges- the dick pics stopped over night). My kids thought I never knew anything…but was convinced I was a witch who could find them anywhere and was just a “sudden neat freak” that always found their stashes of whatever.
My daughter (12) has tons of internet friends, and role plays with them. I know she has an internet girlfriend. She wont’ say anything about it to me for some reason (we’re very close, so i’m really surprised by this). But, the internet girlfriend has her name on her instagram page with lots of hearts and a date so I have to imagine that’s when they started dating. It’s cute, it really is, but she would NEVER admit it to me for whatever reason.
My very prude and private 13-year-old son doesn’t know that I know he sleeps in the nude. I caught his little bum-bum sticking out one morning when I went to wake him up.
My stepdaughter is queer/questioning/most likely gay. Her mental health professional outed her to me and her dad, which pissed us off since we were fine not knowing until she told us. She doesn’t know that we know, and when she’s ready to tell us, we’ll be there for her 100%. But it’s going to be on her time.
I’m not a mum, but my nephew used to stay with me a lot. He’d play on my Xbox downstairs which was logged into my YouTube.
Fast forward a few days, I’m sharing screens with a friend and scrolling through my search history to find a video I found funny.
Next thing I know I’m scrolling past about 20 variations of “boobie”, “booby”, “boncey boob” and “secsy boobie”.
It’s safe to say my friend was confused.
I know my sons a crossdresser. He’s in his 20’s, straight, and loving life. He just likes to cross dress in his spare time and there’s nothing wrong with that.
I’ve known since he was 12. A note to all teenagers and preteens, you’re not even close to as sneaky as you think you are.